Thursday, September 25, 2008

I'm not bitter, I just write that way

If you read my last post then you probably think I am bitter. I am not. I am not bitter. I just think I am entitled to the same amount of luck that everybody else gets.

Actually if you made it all the way through the last post congratulations. I can and usually do try and reread what I post to make sure it is not too boring and is at least recognizable English. I am afraid I got a little bored halfway through the post so I know if I did then you probably did too and I am sorry about that.

It's a good thing I don't have regular access to the Internet as I left out a whole lot of the stuff I was gong to write in an already way to long post.

A list of the things you don't get to read because I don't have access to the Internet except at Internet cafes and the public library.

  • a detailed explanation of Marxist theory of crisis including underconsumptionist theories

  • my purchase of the new Metallica CD (awesome on the scale of awesomeness)

  • my new nickname from Maria at work--awesome?--that is awesome with a question mark and you are supposed to pronounce it that way. Her nickname is Sassy which I think is much better

  • pictures of Sarah Palin's mongrel child
  • inappropriate pictures of a 13 year old Brooke shields I saw on the drunken stepfather blog at the Internet cafe which I have to hide because I am sure people are staring at me funny now which is not fair as I am not the kinda guy who subscribes to y14 magazine so I can beat off to all the jail bait
  • my idea to start a jail bait weblog where I will take advertising and then get rich
  • my one year anniversary at the grocery store and the 50 dollars I blew on buying new clothes for work because I feel once a year I should "treat" myself to a new uniform-I am sure my employer is happy since my workplace does not pay for any of the costs for me to be in uniform even though they require us to have a certain look
  • I am just glad I decided on the black polo shirt (I won for getting a 100% on a recent mystery shop) tan chinos and new cool look shoes that are very hip and young looking and make me appear to be 34 instead of 37. A much better look overall compared to the faded black khakis from target, the white short sleeved dress shirt and black skater styled sneakers.
  • my failure to include enough pictures on my blog because I feel too rushed in the writing process

OK. I guess I don't remember that many of the things I was going to post about. I can tell you that I now have paid $2.34 to sit here and type this post so I hope you guys really enjoyed it. I ran the bill up to $3.64 looking for pictures of Sarah Palin's mongrel child to no avail. So I included a picture of a Foxxy Sarah instead. Enjoy.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

I'm still glad that you're saving the world.

What if I told you that I looked an awful lot like Sarah Palin in high school? I think we must have gotten our hair done at the same joint.

Romius T. said...

i would have been so hot for you (even more than I am now) smart, sassy and a foxxy hair do to boot!@

Anonymous said...

http://failblog.org/2008/09/24/rivet-fail/

I found that funny and could think of no one else who would appreciate as much as myself.... besides you.

Anonymous said...

This is why the dinosaurs are extinct:

http://failblog.org/2008/09/17/packaging-fail-6/

It's clear -- the tails got in the way during the act of mating.

Anonymous said...

I should really just wait & see how many funny ones I find before I "publish my comment" ..oh well, I've never been too supportive of doing what I *should* do anyway.

http://failblog.org/2008/08/25/french-lesson-fail/

Anonymous said...

http://failblog.org/2008/08/15/ad-fail/

I really shouldn't be encouraging this.. I reaaaaally shouldn't..