I can identify a lot with a guy like George Sodini.
We are more alike than I would care to admit.
Like George I am a white male. Only I am a slightly younger version at 38.
We both write blogs.
His blog is here.
On his blog George says things that are very similar to the things I say on my other blog Bathos for the Misanthropic.
I will give a few examples:
George makes plans to kill people:
George:"it is 8:45PM: I chickened out! Shit! I brought the loaded guns, everything. Hell!"
Me:
I guess what I am saying is that if you think you are hot shit try getting off on necrophilia, and then ask yourself if you can spend and hour and a half on Google trying to figure out escape routes from the local mall that you want to blow up. Try going down to the mall carrying a backpack full of knives and count all the security guards you walk past. See if that gets your heart to race. It probably will you fucking retard.
Then order some C4 explosive, a few machine guns and stash a motor bike in the alley a few yards away. Make sure you have a van parked a few miles from the alley by the mall that you can hide your bike and drive off in.
For the more advanced fuckers try to order up a stinger missile and shoot down a few passenger planes with the same idea. You stop by the airport and shoot a few of those puppies off and bike your way to a van that drives you to a safe house where you head off to Mexico.
George is a closet Marxist:
"Early last month, we had our second general layoff. I survived. First one was in November. When I began 10 years ago, that used to be a nice place to work. I understand the need to reduce staff when times sour, but this is out of proportion to the economic problems at this time. The economy is shrinking by about 4-5%. They decided not to pay Christmas bonus - for staff that amounts to about 8% of yearly pay. Well, OK. Plus no yearly "merit" raise, another 3.5%. That totals to about 11% cut. Plus two layoffs of 5% staff in each case.
Do the math. I know this firm is using this downturn as an excuse to take advantage of a bad situation and kill jobs UNNECESSARILY. The second layoff people who actually did work were let go. We all need to pick up the slack so the company can cut beyond what is necessary. Wasn't going to mention it, because of all this shit, it is K&L Gates, the large law firm headquartered here in Pittsburgh. Just call it K&L Gates Corporation. Most people there are OK and I would never have a shoot 'em up there. They paid me for 10 years, so far!"
I run the Karl Marx Blog.
George has not had sex in 20 years.
I have not had sex in 4.
I am just 1/5 the fuck up of George.
George needs a woman.
"A man needs a woman for confidence. He gets a boost on the job, career, with other men, and everywhere else when he knows inside he has someone to spend the night with and who is also a friend. This type of life I see is a closed world with me specifically and totally excluded."
So do I.
"I would hate to think that the vacuum of spirituality that exists in my life is caused not by my profound sensitivity, or at least awareness to the emptiness of existence, but simply by my inability to secure the archetype of feminine beauty that society showcases to me as accessible to all (but some how not for me.)"
Some more of my thoughts on women:
"We want your pussies. We want you to admire us. We crave your attention. We need you to build us up."
George thought things never changed. No matter how hard her tried.
The problem is I feel too good now to do this but too bad to enjoy life. I know I will never enjoy life. This is an over 30 year trend. Some people are happy, some are miserable. It is difficult to live almost continuously feeling an undercurrent of fear, worry, discontentment and helplessness. I can talk and joke around and sound happy but under it all is something different that seems unchangable and a permanent part of my being. I need to realize the details of what I never accomplished in life and to be convinced the future is merely a continuation of the past -
WHICH IT ALWAYS has been. I am making a list of items that will provide motivation to do the exit plan, it won't be published. I always had hope that maybe things will improve especially if I make big attempts to change my life. I made many big changes in the past two years but everything is still the same.
I write along those same lines here.
Come back to this post often. I will update it regularly.
Coming soon:
We both like younger women.
In addition:
I will review Barbara Ellen's:
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