Thursday, July 08, 2010

i need to get out and do something

i need to get out and do something, i've been like stuck in this goddamn condo for what seems like months or something.

i need to "mack" on chicks.  i need to walk straight up to a chick and deliver a classic line about how like my, "my shit is so funny it's like you are terri schivo and my intelligence is a feed tube and im pumping you full of nutrition and you are like possibly dead except for the occasional eye movement which may or may n0t have anything to do with a concious mind in there."


"how am i doing? prolly not well, huh?  but don't show it or kick me to the curb too quickly because my friends said this line would never work and we BOTH know it ain't gonna work---but FUCK them for knowing that it won't work and telln me it won't work..."

"it's like who gets to make them know how shit goes down.  why we gotta let the fucking standard shit work only?  why not sit down and drink a beer with a possible schizophrenic?  what could possibly happen?"

I think i menti0ned rape jokes and how chicks (no matter how fucking progressive a girl is she  just never gets rape jokes and how they are "never funny" and all that so "here i am trying to get you with a rape joke and terri schivo jokes and feeding tube jokes that make you seem possibly like an invalid" which is i think is where i went with the rape jokes and then i think it was around that time that you finally got fed up with all raping, feed tube (could be viewed as my cock in your mouth) jokes and picked your floral covered dress off the bench and went back inside and pointed at me like i'm some kind of creeper--- when all you are is some kind of prissy little bitch that never fucks ugly dudes (which by the way is just exactly the kind of women that gets raped, so now i understand your concern- you see at the time i had no idea you were a prissy little cunt- i thought you were a hipster scene girl, or maybe emo and nerdy and liked computerz and liked to talk about the android third party market and how you'd be upset if you were "on ATT" and could not download a fabtastic app like skype just cuz it wasn't approved by google.

But fuck me. 

one fuckn joke about rape and im dead to you.  one little smack talk about regurgitating your intestines with my penis because you were in need of some intellectual redress and you get pissy fucking tears in you eyes like i'm the kind of guy who spens his time downloading videos of puppies getting boiled alive on youtube

im not like that.  certainly i watch said videos and laugh, but lets face it a lot of kids do that these days.  i just don't waste my time downloading that shit cuz other people do that for me.

speaking of your panties.  don't wear such a see through skirt if you don't want me talkin' about your underwear.. i was just curious if you knew i could see through your skirt as i saw through it from like 30 feet away with a simple glance. "not even trying" as i told u.  did not want to.  i got japanese porn for that.  i don't need to creeper it with you even if i am "peeking on e"

"the drug is not sexual"

i told that to the bouncer.  i told that to the cop.  i told that to your sister after you got up to go get them both.  i think everyone knows that e is not sexual so i was not assaulting you with my eyes

"what the fuck does that even mean?"

like i told yer sister, "its obvious she wants me to look at her panties and nipples, cuz she ain't wearing any fucking underwear and she is wearing a very sheer outfit."

that does not make me rush limbaugh or mel gibson.  i am not a racist.  i am not saying that the only reason obama is president is he is black.

in reality i wish i was black.  it would make a hell of a lot of things easier on me.  like playing basketball, and picking up on white girls with big asses.  not that i really want to do either of those things.  but you get my point.  black people have it so easy these days with food stamps and welfare and a black president also the fact that if i was black i'd know what i'd want for dinner every day.

fried chicken & waffles.  orange crush soda. aunt jemima anything.

KK's Number One Chicken, Waffles, and Cheese Covered Eggswhy yes that is a side of kool aid.

and knowing what's for dinner solves 56% of life's problems.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Women that show the unmentionables thru their skirts are daughters of Delilah, cut the hair Sampson,it's all about rendering YOU, helpless. Chicken n waffles is what black ppl eat. & if really want the black(colored) experience always have a bottle of ketchup.