Monday, May 11, 2009
I do less all day than you do before 9 am.
I have no hope.
Without hope I don't have to worry about getting depressed. Depressed people are always looking out at the world with expectations and getting only reality to stare back at them. Reality has a way of kicking you in the ass. Reality is a hundred and twelve degree day in Phoenix. Sweat pouring down your balls. Your asshole so smelly it could kill a turtle.
Walking the curbs.
Walking the sidewalks in this town is always an adventure. And I don't mean the homeless people. It's easy to ignore the homeless when you drive around town in your air conditioned cars.
Waiting at the bus stop with them is a different story.
Homeless people always ask me for money. I bet we have that in common. Talking about shared experiences passes for funny. Ask Dane Cook. Not that I have anything against Dane Cook. He is very likable.
Anytime a homeless person asks me for money I always tell them, "I was just about to ask you for some." Then I tell them I need the money to get to work.
"I just need a few bucks for the bus."
I figure if I get to work I won't be homeless.
"What the world needs is fewer homeless people. Since you are already homeless you might as well give me the money and keep me from getting fired which will allow me to keep my apartment and not be homeless which will not add to the suffering of the world."
Never argue philosophy with the homeless.
All homeless people have PhD's in Philosophy. They will quote you guys from 300 years ago you have only heard of.
Eventually you will agree with whatever homeless guy has said and give him a dollar so you can put on your headphones and jack up the volume to UFO's "Youngblood."
"That's an easy-going hard rocking song with caustic lyrics."
I think the description of this song from the YouTube submitter is right on.
If you wondered why I posted a picture of Miley Cyrus in a bikini it's because my posting a picture of her in stockings blew my stats up by 100 hits a day. I like all the hits I get even though the hits represent a few hundred perverts who click on the site for 3 seconds to view the photo.
At least with my stats rocking out like this I can get up for writing in the blog. And since so many of you wait by the computer for my posts all these Miley Cyrus pictures benefit you too. I mean I know I still have only 14 followers which means that most of you who read me don't have gmail or are too embarrassed to place your profile on my blog. I am not sure I can blame you. But I sure could use more followers.
Miley Cyrus looked pretty good in that bikini.
I figure I have to get around about writing about Slacker Anger. Only thing is that writing sometimes allows the anger to dissipate into the background cosmic radiation that sat around in the universe for 15 billion years before we came around and designed experiments to appreciate it.
The Boston Globe wrote about Slackers. How we downsized life. And how our downsized lives made us recession proof. I wrote about that the other day. But of course I am always a few steps ahead of the mainstream. That's why you read this blog. I'm always a few steps ahead of you.
Like I know how that song rocks....