Friday, May 29, 2009

I must warn you that I may talk about brownies somehere in the middle of this post

I've worked 11 days in a row. My back is all screwed up. I can feel a giant ball of tension in my back and I hunch my shoulders whenever I sit at the computer.

I got invited to go "tubing" down the river. One of the new 18 year old courtesy clerks invited me. We are friends because she tells me how she likes to go out and party on the weekend.

She did coke on Thursday. On Friday she did E. Saturday started off with E, but then she and some friends decided to do a few coke lines as well. I guess that fucked her up because she slept all day Sunday which meant that I had to scan groceries and then bag them myself.

My back is killing me now. Did I mention that? I think my backaches are giving me headaches because now all of a sudden I have a headache. I am going to have to take something for it. I tried drinking 2 cokes in hopes that all I was having was caffeine withdraws. But the cokes did not help so I went ahead and took ibuprofen. Who cares if the ibuprofen causes my liver to fail? Worse case scenario is I wake up in a pool of my own shit.

If I die in some kind of "shitty" accident people will gloss over how how I am a failure at the funeral and only talk about the tragic circumstances of my death and speculate about what my roommate is going to do with a bed that is soaked in feces.

I have shit on the brains because my roommate made brownies. Brownies always make me think of shit. Even though brownies are awesome.

Did you know that the brownie recipe of today is really only about a hundred years old? And that the brownie is considered a cookie-bar and not a cake? The internet is full of wonderful information.


DrugMonkey, Master of Pharmacy said...

Good news my friend. Ibuprofen will rot your kidneys, but leave your liver untouched. And kidneys are easier to transplant than livers.

Assuming your insurance company's OK with it that is.

Romius T. said...

this is good news ,,,i will consume with impunity...

素人 said...


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