Friday, June 29, 2007

I officially adopt Kerry Howley. She is my new Girl Friend

Kerry may not yet be famous. But that's because I have not talked about her. She is an associate editor for Reason Magazine. Which means she is a Libertarian.

I don't like to think about her politics, because they make me puke. But I do like to watch her on TV. She frequently shows up on my favorite new TV series Red Eye. Red Eye airs on the Fox News Channel.

Red Eye is almost as funny as the Daily Show. Which makes it 400 times funnier than Fox's other effort at humor the Half Hour News Hour.

I want the world and more importantly my readers to know about Kerry because I plan on having this blog adopt her. Doctor Von Monkeystein started an adoption program on his blog. It's called Adopt an Actor. I have taken a few liberties with his proposal by not adopting an actual actor, but by adopting a TV personality and celebrity journalist. I figure I can squeeze Kerry under the auspices of actor because she shows up on a TV show as a regular guest.

Either way I don't care about rules. I want Kerry Howley to be my adopted actor. I want Kerry to find my blog and ask me to marry her. The answer is yes, Kerry. I will marry you. I'll even drop out of the Communist Party for you if want.

In case you have never seen an episode of Red Eye, here is a fake transcript example of every Red Eye ever made. Funny if you know the show and it even features Kerry.


greensunflower said...

I wouldn't put my head between her legs. But hey, to each their own.

Romius T. said...

o my gosh. i think she is just bomb. too bad you won'tbe putin your head between her thighs,what a sight to behold!

Dr. Monkey Von Monkerstein said...

Actually Splotchy started the adopting thing and I stole it from him. I get all my best shit from Splotchy.

Splotchy said...

romius t., you have bent the rules into a strange pretzel shape, but I must honor your wishes.


May you and your adoptee be happy, even in wedded incestual bliss.