Thursday, February 21, 2013

Don't let it get you down

i woke up with only thirty minutes to spare.  my alarm didn't go off. i set the alarm fine.  it just seems some times my phone doesn't like to do it's job.  which  i guess is fine by me, because frankly speaking i don't much care to do my job all the time either, and i don't really see the reason to discriminate against inanimate objects the way you people fetishisizers do.

not that most of you care about suffering.  at least people suffering.  you are more likely to cry your hearts out at a sad puppy dying story, than to give a moments thought to your fellow man.

let me explain another way that even your emotionally defunct brain can recognize.  what's sadder a baby dying or a german sheppard?  what if the baby accidentally pulls a string that drops an anvil onto the baby who then crushes the puppy.  who do you cry for?  the puppy, right?

that's the definition of mental illness.

buy i digress.

i got up late today. so i took a three minute shower.   a three minute shower consists of shampooing you hair and washing most of your body parts with one of those pink wire sponges that have replaced washcloths.  i wonder whatever happened to the washcloth makers, did they get jobs in factories where they make wire brushes?  or did they have too much disdain for wire sponge makers, secretly knowing that their product, while overlooked now by the market, was truly the better material and body cleaner.  my secret hope is they walked out on those evil wire sponge makers and left the city to form some kind of commune where people drink unpasteurized milk and used cotton to bathe themselves.

work was uneventful, save for an argument between my ex-internet gf and a female friend from work.  it got ugly at one point with erin shouting that she didn't give a fuck what tarri said, "that we are talkin and tell her to shut the fuck up."

erin likes to talk like she's a gangster but she reminds me of the actress Jamie Lynn Sigler's character from men with kids, a tv show that may be on the air for a decade, so we really ought to just come to terms with it. I mean tempest bledsoe is proving she can be a comedic actress, and the catchy theme song, and cushy timeslot mean we have plenty of time to really get in to the meat of the characters of this show.

after work i took the new roommate to the local comic store where we saw groups of nerds playing some updated game of dungeons and dragons.  the group included a few of those nerdy girls that suddenly pretend to be into looting and dragon slaying and coming up with ways to get out of predicaments like, "did anyone try shooting the horse?" which just seems plain mean to me and i don't even like animals.

all these girls get jobs at the renascence fair.  most of em have the acting bug.  many of them don't take showers.  but i would have loved them in my teen years when women wouldn't look at me.  not that they do now, unless it is to cry in fear of my massive ghetto booty.

the girls at the ice cream parlor we visited after where sure looking lecherously at me, i bet it's not often a middle aged man in an aging volvo drives up in the rain with one working windshield wiper while a 22 year old girl gets out and pays for his double large oreo blaster ice cream with the waffle bowl.  those girls were super jealous and jesse the roommate was furious her extra large scoop of ice cream was half the size of mine.  jesse was on her period and if she wasn't bullied by the idea of getting on birth control and leaving her period and condoms stuck to the tile floor of the restroom then we'd have had a throw down.

now i'm back home.  second half of a valium and two beers later i'll be going to sleep soon.  i won't be dreaming of you. but then again, maybe i will. or maybe that's just half crazy sauce.

friday is the day i go to the doctor, get my poison toenail removed, maybe even the gangrene if it hasn't set in too much. i might just keep ya posted.  seems like i have maybe attracted a few new readers.  the light at the tunnel is always there.  just worry it's a train and gonna kill me.  but even then, put's me out of my misery.


s + e + b said...

Hi, Romius T. I think you said idea, then are "condoms stuck to the floor" and "getting on birth control and leaving my period"...
Dream Romius T.: Yes?
Lies T>: I don't know; I guess I see now, although multiple ideas in themselves, some also implicate others.

Let me set you straight on what to use, please, not what to say. First, you won't have trouble shitting if you stay off narcotics. Then you won't write about it. I was afraid of it but my doctor scares me, too. I took 60 mgs of Oxy seven months, and I do not recommend Suboxone. I recommend freedom and joy.
Next, the Japanese have a sublime bathtub washcloth which is prickly fabric, sheds water, and lasts ten years: SALUX EXFOLIATING JAPANESE BATH CLOTH.

I may as well round out the informnation blotch by introduction to YOGAS. Positioning ourselves over the sink, we fill our cupped hands with warm water and snort it straight up the nose as hard as we can. Surprisingly, we do not drown, it just flows out the mouth. We are then sneezing anytime we feel like cleaning our nose (blow).

Romius T. said...

Seb, don't worry, not on the narcotics, i poop too much that's the problem! I'll look into the Japanese sponge might be nice

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