Sunday, August 20, 2006

I work in a zoo.

You can't do much to surprise me these days. If I am not being constantly swarmed by flies or attacked by by giant ants called termites or getting drenched soaking wet, I couldn't call it a work day.

So I push through the back door entrance to the bakery to find birds. There are birds in the bakery.

"Is this a fucking zoo?"

Seriously, I do not like birds. I have mentioned somewhere that birds like to attack me. I was attacked by a flock of seagulls, then my girlfriend dumps me on the same day I get fired.

My appreciation for Darwin knows no bounds, but I have no intention of share working space with finches, or whatever the fuck they were.

"I don't think you should put a bread crumb trail down and lead it to the freezer in hopes of killing those cute little birds."

I don't see why not. That's how I kill the flies.


Knows It All said...

Disgusting. Credit to you for not just stomping them. Yikes! I really don't like birds..s and I'm very afraid of any kind of black birds.

Jezebelsriot said...

Birds don't bother me too much, except for the giant black crow perched outside my window. But that one is most likely an evil minion sent by my ex boyfriend. He was all into that black magic dorky mumbo jumbo. Like "Oooh, boogety boogety, I'm so deep and brooding and dark and I'll hex you bitch." Ha! I showed him, there are some things even a hex can't fix- liking fucking all his friends.

Romius T. said...

Knowing you J. in your let us call it your not so monogamous stage would have been perfect.

You could have cuckolded me, as long as I could watch!