Wednesday, April 24, 2013

What have we learned?

Here's what we know.

We must be the one's in charge. The government doesn't have sole legitimacy to use force. Maybe we should all be learning to build bombs.

Those crazy Russian Muslims understand one thing correctly, we live in a decadent society. Some days the only reason I get off the toilet and stop playing with Mr. Tablet and cell phone is that I feel like eating double cheese burgers from Whataburger!

Somebody should pay for that!

MOSTLY I think it should be college aged girls who don't seem to want to give me the time of day.

I can't understand why. I'm down to 206 lbs. Sure, I got out of breath just typing this. But I'm doing what I can. Like today, I just cashed in my aluminum cans. Made $8! I could totally take a young lady to share a fast food meal with me. And after giving me the hymlic we could watch Netflix, if she's got her parents password, and her brother's done streaming Extreme Coupon shows.

So buck up Americans! It's not all bad outside. Buy some nitrous, order a few fireworks. Get political. Spread the fire. And get me laid.