Monday, September 11, 2006
I like it better when he wears the Glove.
Why? I still touch myself in inappropriate places with the glove. Do you think the glove gives you some kinda magical protection against the germs?
Let me assure you that people who wear gloves forget to be hygienic because they think, "Well, I am already wearing gloves. So I guess I can pick up fecal matter if I want to."
Of course at my store gloves are not only optional, but they are essentially useless. The 'Visitors' are always over making a mess of things.
Now to the part of the show where I answer questions that I know the answer to.
Q. How do I make sure I get the freshest food at a bakery?
A. Go to the bottom or the back of any rack, we place all the new stuff there. Do not; however, ask any employee "Is this fresh?"
It's insulting to us. You are implying that we are not doing our job. We are probably not, but that's something you'd be better off not knowing.
Second, have you ever heard the reply back "Um..no, try this one, that one is like totally old and shit." I didn't think so.
Q. I notice only women work in most bakeries. You're a guy, does that make you gay?
A. No I am not, not that there is anything wrong with that. Second, the occasional visit to a glory hole in no way commits one to a homosexual label. I am not even sure it makes you 'Bi.' I have small penis and I may not have been exposed to as much testosterone as you in the womb, but I make up for it by going bald early and growing hair out of my ears. Fourth, who doesn't need a little cock now and then, am I right girls?